Broken, But Healing
by quackferme
Summary: Hermione allows the barrier that had separated her from living her life since she was ten to finally break. The pain might always be there, but she can no longer let it lead her through life.
1. Chapter 1

Well im going to tell you now that this story is obviously going to be based around Hermione. However everything is going to be normal....no magic or anything. All of the same characters will be introduced but without magic. Sorry but its the only way i can see getting this story to go where i'm hoping to get it. Thanks.

_

* * *

_

Dear Charles,

_You will never understand how hard this letter is for me to write. In all honestly, I have nothing to say to you that will ever convey how much pain and hatred I have inside of me towards you. I can't even bring myself to feel that very pain. All I feel and will ever feel is numb, because that is the only way I can keep the hurt from being so excruciating that it feels like I've been stabbed hundreds of times and had salt water poured over the wounds. I hope that for every minute of every day for the rest of your life you remember that you are the reason for that pain. You are the reason behind all of the pain of my entire family, and the pain of members of your own family. I hope you realize that nothing you do for the rest of your life will ever bring you up from this. You are nothing to me nor will you ever be anything to me, just like I was nothing to you. You may have been able to steal my childhood from me, but I refuse to allow what you have done to me to ruin the rest of my life._

_Hermione_

As she began to read through the letter she had just written, silent tears streamed down Hermione's face. The first tears she had cried since she was ten years old; over six years.

When she got to the last sentence, she let the barrier that had been put in place by her ten-year-old self crumble inside of her. The pain that came through was more than she could bear, and she collapsed to the floor and began to tremble as the sobbing over took her.

* * *

yea its short ..... sorry but i'll probably end up editing it later. The next chapter should be better hopefully

so keep watch =]


	2. Chapter 2

When the pain had eased to where she could stand again, Hermione pulled her body up from the floor slowly, as to keep from falling again, and made her way to her bed. As she eased her body backwards onto the fuzzy comforter beneath her, she began to think back to the last time she could remember feeling so much emotion. It had been so long ago, and yet the memory was still clear in her head, as though it had happened only two days ago.

* * *

She was situated in the center of the room on a cold, sturdy oak chair that was centered itself on a platform enclosed with wooden walls that were just short enough that her tiny body could see over. Behind her there were rows of benches that resembled the ones of most churches with cushions covered in red velvet fabric. In front of her there was a tall stand that had intricate, curvy detailing carved into the wood. There were very few people in the room, only about ten, which made the room seem even more massive.

Behind the stand in front of her was the judge. He was dressed in a long, flowing black robe. His head was bald, and his skin was rather pale. Next to him, in a chair lower than the stand he sat on was a woman in a gray pinstripe suit with brown hair that came just below her shoulders. In her lap was a silver laptop which she was typing on furiously while gazing around at everything in the room but the screen. In the pews behind her were two women. One was rather large with a tight gray bun atop her head. She was situated in the aisle on a wheelchair. Next to her on the end of the pew was a woman with short blond hair. She sat rather poised conversing lightly with the woman next to her in a low voice. There were also two people, one on either side of her sitting at small tables. The one to her right was a woman with short, dark blond hair in a deep blue suit. On her other side, there was a man also suited with dark brown hair.

The last person in the room was the one person she tried to avoid looking at but after looking around several times she could no longer hold her gaze away from him.

Her father was dressed in a bright orange suit, with handcuffs around his wrists that were chained to the stand in front of him. His head was lowered as he stared at his hands. The top of his head was bald and the rest was covered with wispy strands of the same curly dirty blond hair of Hermione's.

After a few minutes of waiting, the woman to her right came over to her. She attached a speaker box to the front of her shirt, with a small microphone attachment clipped to the collar of her shirt.

Then, everything began happening rather quickly. She hadn't been paying attention and suddenly noticed everyone was fussing over her. She realized that the blond woman had asked her a question, and when she hadn't been heard they assumed that the microphone wasn't working. As she stared at the people around her attempting to turn up the volume of her microphone, she suddenly felt nauseated.

The room began to spin around her, but she attempted to hold her composure by telling herself it would soon be over.

Looking back, Hermione realized she hadn't really known the term lawyer when she was ten. She thought the people questioning her were just……well, she didn't know what they were doing exactly. Nothing had really made sense to her about this whole situation. She knew why she was there; her father had done something bad. What she didn't understand was why these people cared, and why it was their business to ask these questions.

"Hermione, how old are you?" the woman inquired her.

"Ten" she replied softly. She could barely focus; every object she tried to keep her attention on seemed to turn away from her in the dizziness.

"Good. Now I need you to tell me if you recognize that man in the orange."

"Yes."

"Can you tell me his name and his relation to you please?"

"Charles Granger…he….he's my father." She said the last part slowly, not knowing if father was a good way to describe their relationship. More like the-guy-who's-sperm-made-me because in reality that was the only good he had ever done for her life.

"Now I'm going to ask you some questions about things that may be uncomfortable, but I need you to answer them honestly okhay?" Her lawyer asked her.

"Khay." She said simply.

"Okhay, I need you to tell me why it was that you and your brother were taken from your mother originally Hermione." She started slowly.

"Okhay." She took a few seconds to remember. "Well the last time I was with him, he got really mad at us, and started throwing stuff. After he threw everything we had to clean it up but we couldn't find the remote batteries. He set the timer and told us if we couldn't find them by the time the timer went off we were going to get spanked. The timer went off and he whipped us. Then he did it again and again but we still couldn't find the batteries. When he was done we were both crying really hard and could barely breathe from it. He made us go to bed. When we went back to my mom's house she saw the marks on my brother when he was going to take a bath and asked him what happened. Then she asked me too."

"Thank you." She said when she was finished. "Now I need you to tell me about the first time you told someone about how your father molested you."

At that Hermione hesitated for a second. It was the first time she had really thought about what happened to her as "molestation." Everyone usually talked about it in phrases like, "what he did to you" or "he touched you." Molestation made her feel dirty and ashamed.

"When I was four I told my grandmother and she told my mom. When my mom asked my dad he said that he would never do that and he couldn't believe I said that. Then my mom had me talk to some lady but she told my mom that I kept changing my story so I must have just heard it somewhere and not understood it."

"Thank you, now could you tell me about what happened to make this come up again."

"Well our babysitter was asking us if we miss our dad at all since we didn't see him anymore. My brother told her that we would all sleep in the same bed and it was fun. Then he told her that our dad used to touch him and make him do stuff with him. My mom asked me about it and I told her that it was true….She started to cry and puke."

"When you say he did stuff to you, what do you mean?" The lawyer asked.

"Uhm..well he would touch me and make me touch him and take my clothes off." Hermione responded quietly.

"Where would he touch you and where would he make you touch him?"

"On our private parts." Hermione said trying to block the sick memories from her mind.

"What would he say to you when you were done?"

"He would tell me he was sorry and that this was wrong and he would make me pinky promise to not tell anyone and that he would never do it again."

"Thank you. You've done a very good job. You can leave now." The woman escorted her from the platform. Before leaving however, as she passed the women in the pews, she stopped. Tears were streaming down their faces. Hermione hugged her grandmother and her aunt. They told her how much they missed her and that they hoped they would see her soon. She couldn't speak as she walked the rest of the way out. It was her mother's turn now.

* * *

As she thought back to that day, she realized how numb hearing all of the questions her lawyer had asked her made her. Even though they had gone over them a million times, it hadn't been what she expected. Outside the courtroom she had been almost comfortable talking about it; she hadn't really understood the seriousness of the situation. But once everything had been put in such uncomfortable terms, she blocked the feeling of disgust and sadness from her mind. Since that day she had blocked every unwelcome feeling from her body, becoming numb to the outside world.

Now that the shield was broken, all of the pain that had accumulated on the other side of the wall hit her at once and it was almost unbearable. She knew she would get through it though. Now, hopefully, she could move on.

* * *

Well it was longer.......

i should probably talk about this now and i will probably make a note on the first chapter too later but there won't be magic in this story. The same characters will be included but Hogwarts will be just a regular school. Sorry if u don't like it but its my story and that is the only way that i can make it work the way im hoping to. please review.

thanks.


End file.
